SPOILERS FOR EVERYTHING HARRY POTTER
The first Harry Potter book I’ve read was Order of the Phoenix and it took me about 1 month and 4 tries to read the first 200 pages because nothing compelling happened. But I pushed myself to go on and a little while later I was completely hooked. They called me HP hooker. I waited impatiently for the 6th and 7th book and then went straight back and finally started from the beginning (since then I read through them every year). To this day, the 5th one is my favorite book of the series. And the movie is pretty awesome too.
However, Deathly Hallows was a pain to read. First of all, I just didn’t want them to grow up. Where’s Peter Pan when you need him? I think nobody wanted this franchise to end so the last part was particularly hard to read anyways. But the plot was so boring in certain parts and too crammed in others. Plus, I never have been and never will be a fan of Ginny ending up with Harry. Nonetheless, I will not disregard the most definite over-all beauty of the last book in the series and will focus my rant on solely the movie versions.
The unfortunate thing is that the 6th movie completely screwed over the entire plotline for the last instalment. They freakin left out the whole background story of the Gaunts and Tom Riddle and how he decided which items to choose for his Horcruxes. Instead, they had to focus on awkward love entanglements and jealous quarrels among the golden trio and with others. Sure, it’s interesting and funny at times but if you don’t think the books (and movies) are first and foremost about friendship, get outta here! And do I have to explain the whole burning down of the Burrow thing? Let’s just obliviate that bs. My point is: Half-Blood Prince bombed wholes into the road and tore down the bridge for Deathly Hallows. Whether the people responsible cared or not, I don’t know but this leaves the whole Horcrux story dangling like a passed-out Spider-Man.
Therefore, instead of looking for certain items which Harry knows (or at least strongly suspects) to be holders of Tom Riddle’s torn soul from diving into the Pensieve with Dumbledore, he feels them? He literally has flashes of the objects in his mind and when he walks past them he can feel their presence and hear them “talk”. What the hell?! Harry is lucky, no doubt, but it’s not like he intravenously pumps Felix Felicis into his system at all times. This not only discredits Dumbledore’s research and wisdom but also Harry’s struggles with trying to understand – and to a point even sympathize with – the man who killed his parents in order to destroy him.
What makes matters even worse is the RUSH. Most of the Horcruxes are found in the last movie and it feels so illogical and rushed, it physically hurts me to watch. Guess why this happened? Because they had to split the last book into two movies. I could rant about this for ages and even more than Deathly Hallows Part 2, Part 1 is the most boring, static, unnecessary, waste-of-time instalment in this cinematic franchise. As a die-hard fan, I left the theater almost crying and about to take on a new identity since such a big part of my life was ripped into pieces before my eyes. The story is fleshed out until nothing is left. Plot development is hardly existent, acting is so-so and the build-up for the grand finale almost doesn’t happen. The same thing was done to The Hobbit franchise and pretty much anything that makes money is stretched like my jeans after a Sunday of eating.
One movie. That’s all it needed. And now we’re getting at least 5 Fantastic Beasts? Please just let me use the time turner. Just once!
And now Ladies and Gentlemen, the absolute worst thing in the Deathly Hallows movies, the thing that makes me want to walk into Imhotep’s crib and calmly let flesh-eating bugs feast on my body: You have your mother’s eyes. OR NOT.
Can anyone please explain to me why it was so hard to find a child actress who had blue eyes? Or just digitally change her eye color afterwards? It’s not even important that book-Harry has green eyes and Daniel Radcliffe has blue ones (I know, the whole contacts thing) – the MOST important thing is that he has the same eyes as his beloved mother Lily. Besides the phrase being iconic and symbolically meaningful, Severus Snape is contantly reminded of a person he loved, covered with the looks of a person he hated. In the pivotal scene of his death, he surrenders an intimate memory to Harry and repeats the phrase above. And what does the audience get? Little Severus and Lily playing together, conjuring up little tricks and freaking brown eyes. It’s a mystery how nobody noticed or cared while writing the script, shooting the scenes or editing it later. Shame *ding ding* Shame *ding ding*
I am aware that many people will think I’m crazy and dellusional and maybe I am too harsh on David Yates and all but … this is how I feel about it. I would really like to know whether I’m alone with this opinion or if anyone agrees? Please tell me in the comments and feel free to rant about other movies in the franchise. It’s not a crime to dislike (parts of) Harry Potter 😉
PS: An honorary mention is Voldemort’s weak death scene in Part 2 which I’ve talked about here.